Through DRCNet's This Week Online, I learned of a column in The San Antonio Express by Jan Jarboe Russell, titled "America's Drug Czar and Latest Strategy Are 'Highly' Deluded."  Ms. Russell is no libertarian, but is wise enough to pillory the drug czar's pompous nonsense.  Seeing an ever-growing river of columns like hers is heartening to those of us who oppose the drug war.

But let us not stop our celebration quite yet!  First, we must sip from the cup of wisdom offered by Drug Czar John P. Walters, via Ms. Russell:

According to Walters, the primary challenge of every civilized society is to "push back from the destructive tendencies of its individuals" . . . and the way to do that is to morally condemn drug users.

Wow.  Change the ending to "and the way to do that is to morally condemn (and stop by any means necessary) individuals who attempt to wield illegitimate power over others' lives," and it makes sense.  As written, especially given the unstated but clear implication that the "condemnation" will be at the point of a government gun, it reveals Walters as an authoritarian thug.  But of course, we knew that.

Walters talked earnestly about how he wants to appeal to the "idealism" of drug users in post-Sept. 11 America.  He cited a statistic--of the 4 million drug-dependent people in America, 65 percent of them have a primary dependence on marijuana--and said he wants to make a connection in the minds of these marijuana users that "smoking a joint is harming democracy."

Let's begin with the misuse of the word "democracy."  It means simply, "rule of the majority."  So, in the sense that smoking a joint defies the will of a majority of busybodies, the sentence makes a kind of twisted sense.  What Walters probably means, however, is to use the word as a synonym for "good society, like America" as opposed to "bad society, like China."  In truth, democracy has nothing to do with whether a society is enlightened or repressive.  One need only look at the United States today to see that "democracy" is no check to a descent into tyranny.  Nazi Germany was also completely "democratic," let us not forget.

"Idealism"?  By all means, let's appeal to it.  But then we have to oppose the venerable Mr. Walters, since people like him are the embodiment of all that is antithetical to idealism.

Four million drug-dependent Americans?  The figure is much higher if the most abused drug, alcohol, is included.  Or if all the prescription drug users are included.  Marijuana is the most popular illegal drug, and therefore . . . well, more or less exactly nothing.  Unless you're a guy whose job depends upon pushing lies.

Smoking a joint is harming something or somebody?  Possibly the guy doing the smoking.  So, potentially, is eating a Twinkie.  Oops, sorry, I almost forgot, that's going to be the NEXT installment in our never-ending series of "Wars on Terrible Things" in this "Land of the Free and Home of the Brave."

After reading Ms. Russell's column, I believe I should take some action, to show Mr. Walters how I feel about his stirring speech.  Would somebody please sell me some pot?  It may be harmful, but dang!  I've got to do my duty.  And maybe some cocaine, too.  Anybody got any LSD?  I think maybe I'll have me a drug orgy.

OK, Walters, visualize this: My left hand is holding a panoply of a dozen or more illegal drugs.  My right hand is giving you the one-finger salute.  Now complete the picture by imagining what I'm saying.

I think I'll call this my "USA Patriot" salute.  It'd make a lot more sense than calling last fall's abomination of a law by that name.