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The War on Bust Exclusive to STR Pamela
Anderson is best known for her (surgically enhanced)
well endowed bust and her raunchy videos that leave little
to the imagination. Lately Ms. Anderson has attempted to
destroy someone else’s bust.
She has asked Kentucky Governor Ernie Fletcher to
remove the bust of Harland Sanders (AKA Colonel
Sanders) founder of the Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC)
restaurant chain from the State Capitol. The Governor has
refused Ms. Anderson’s request to remove the Colonel’s
bust. Ms.
Anderson’s request came with the backing of PETA (People
for the Ethical Treatment of Animals). They claim that the
chickens eaten at KFC are treated inhumanely and are put to
death in atrocious ways. PETA advocates for animal rights
that put animals on the same level as humans. They would
also like to see all humans become not just vegetarians but
vegans. There’s nothing wrong with PETA’s attempt to
turn us all into leaf eaters by peaceful persuasion, but
their attempt to lift animals to the level of humans only
exposes their deep felt contempt for humanity itself (one I
must admit I sometimes share, for different reasons). Maybe
Pamela just feels a bit of professional jealousy for the
Colonel since his restaurants serve big, juicy and succulent
breast. Recently
I had a tumor removed from my eight-year-old German
Shepherd, Thor. Notice I said I had it removed since Thor,
who is a (by dog standards) cognizant adult male canine,
could not make that decision for himself. Thor may know that
he does not feel well but he has no clue as to why he feels
the way he does or what he must do to feel better, and he
never will. Unfortunately, the tumor removed (by a human)
was Squamous Cell Carcinoma: a very aggressive form of
cancer. Thor does not know that he has an incurable disease
or that he is going to die soon (not necessarily a bad
thing). Thor
will be treated well--as he always has been--and eat lots of
steak, pork and chicken (don’t tell PETA) in the coming
days, until it becomes apparent that he is in pain and no
longer enjoying his existence, at which point I will choose
to put him to “sleep.”
A
cow may share some of our physiological components, but the
most intelligent one among them can’t design and build a
car on its most lucid day. Even if humans stopped eating
animals, animals would surely not stop eating animals.
When was the last time you saw a vegan lion? The
Federal Government--not to be outdone--recently jumped into
this beastly war on bust by deporting a buxom Argentine
temptress known as Dorismar.
The Department of Homeland Security busted her as she exited
the shower in nothing more than a bath towel (similar to the
one seen on Osama bin Laden’s head).
The voluptuous female was allowed to dress before
being handcuffed (leave it to the government to get even
this wrong), and escorted to the airport where she and her
husband were put on a plane to But
the bust did not stop there, Cuban born model “Sissi”
was purported to have snitched out her dueling diva Dorismar
to Homeland Security. In a press conference (this is news?)
with her face covered with tears (that eventually dripped on
to her bust) Sissi denied any involvement in Dorismar’s
deportation (perhaps she was caught thanks to a presidential
wire tap). Has
humanity gone mad? Pamela Anderson--a woman seen on film
physically abusing her husband (not that film)--now wants
Colonel Sanders’ (who’s been dead for over 20 years)
bust removed from the Kentucky Capitol building because she
alleges that employees of the company he founded are
mistreating chickens. The US Government raids the home of a
starlet who has made countless public appearances in the discuss this column in the forum Emiliano
Antunez,
41, DDS Degree UCE Dom Rep, semi anarchist, quasi-nihilist,
and a touch of pragmatist,
with a penchant (Midas touch) for business and clueless in politics (campaigned
hard for mayor of Miami and got less than 1% of the vote “the masses
are revolting”).
Formerly on the Board of
Miami
Dade Housing and Finance Authority and currently
serving on the board of the Overtown Community (in)Action Agency. |